BC (Before Cancer)

I haven’t really felt up to writing to for a couple of days. I’m going through the typical faux flu I experience the week after chemo: weakness, aching muscles, cough, sore throat, runny nose, headaches, and my body temperature doesn’t seem to know how to regulate itself properly. It’s hard not to be in a good mood despite this when it seems that I’m so close to being done. My last round of chemo is scheduled for July 23^rd. If my white count is low again when I go in on that day, I will come back July 30^th. I’m not sure if more scans will be necessary at that point or how we will proceed from there. After I recover a bit from the last round of chemo, I imagine Dr. Barnes, the surgeon, while take out this annoying medical port. Then I know Dr. Gore will want to keep close tabs on me for a while and I will continue to have to go back for checkups I think yearly even after that since the type of ovarian cancer I had/have has such a high incidence of reoccurrence. 

Tuesday, the day after chemo, I had to go back to the cancer center as per usual to receive my immune booster shot (Neulasta) and to very slowly take in 2 bags of IV fluids. I hate going back for this because it ends up taking as long as the chemo, but the fluids really make me feel better. The steroids I’m given the day of chemo make my blood sugars nearly impossible to control which leaves me dehydrated and at a higher risk of getting sick. The fluids rehydrated me and help to flush out the excess glucose in my system. So ultimately worth the 5 extra hours at the cancer center. 

More news that puts a smile on my face: I found out that I that I got a 300 out of 300 points on my stage makeup final (that crazy Picasso inspired makeup). Getting A’s in my classes means more than it normally would because now I am feeling more confident in my mental capabilities – like chemo brain has not defeated me. 

I have written a bit in this blog about wanted to actively pursue my dreams now. BC (Before Cancer), I was timid and could talk myself out of even small risks or escapades. Even just asking someone I was interested in out on a date was too scary. I don’t want to think like that anymore. I want to get the most out of my life. A start was emailing the coordinator of study abroad programs at my university to find out more information about a semester abroad and how I can make something like that happen. I emailed her over a month ago and then sent another email a few days ago to a different address. I have not heard back from her so I don’t really have any news to report. Sadly, based on the limited information on the website, Sweden did not look an option. My university does have an exchange program with a university in Germany (TU Dortmund) however, I will just have to wait for more information. It does give me something exciting to think about though. :-)

Sorry if the writing is crap, I feel like I’m only halfway awake and halfway aware. It also seems the dogs have decided to punish me for sleeping later by ripping apart a down pillow and scattering it’s entrails all over the house.